This is a spamfic that I sent to the FFML a long time ago. It is my take on a Ranma/Sailor Moon Cross Over. It is meant to be funny, but I PROMISE not to put Ranma in a Senshi Uniform. (Yeah, it's got some Hitchhiker influence.) Don't take it seriously, okay?
Ranma Saotome dusted off his hands and smiled confidently. It had been a long, hard battle, but he had succeeded per normal. He looked around at the massive property damage and the numerous rubberneckers being directed away by those strange young women in the short sailor skirts. They had showed up unexpectedly and started making speeches and throwing around weird energy attacks shortly after the Akane's-Cooking Monster had escaped from the home-ec classroom and started its rampage.
He turned to the leader of the group. "Thanks for your help," he said casually. "That thing would have been a lot harder to get rid of by myself."
The girl, a cute blonde with an outrageous hairstyle posed dramatically. The others, sensing a dramatic moment gathered behind her doing a team frieze. "Just doing our duty!" she said, in the same tone she'd used to tell the monster that it would be punished. "We are the Sailor Scouts. I'm Sailor Moon and this is Sailor Mars, Sailor Mercury, Sailor Saturn, and Sailor Pluto."
"Ranma Saotome," Ranma said dashingly.
"Ranma Saotome?" Pluto asked, speaking for the first time.. Her calm, mysterious front weakening slightly.
"‘Sright." he reaffirmed with a charming smile basking in the admiring looks of the younger girls.
Sailor Pluto's face twitched.
"THE Ranma Saotome?" another twitch.
"Yeah," said Ranma, beginning to worry about the mental health of the oldest scout. The others, startled by this uncharacteristic behavior also turned to look at their companion.
Sailor Pluto snickered.
She quickly composed herself when she saw the worried looks of her friends, then she looked up at Ranma's confused face.
She snickered again, this time putting a hand to her mouth in a vain attempt to cover her smile.
Her facade of cool was trying to reassert itself, but in the end she couldn't keep it in place. She began to laugh in earnest.
"HAA HAA HAA!!! RANMA (gasp gasp) SAOTOME!!! *THE* RANMA SAOTOME!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!"
Before long the amused Pluto was no longer coherent. As she rolled on the ground, she kept saying the name Ranma Saotome over and over, and muttering something incomprehensible about the Plaything of the Gods. Ranma, his face betraying his wounded pride skulked away moodily. Maybe Kasumi had something nice for him to eat.
Pluto's laughing subsided minutes later, and she looked up at the stares of the other scouts. "Sorry," she said, wiping her eyes. "It's just that... it's just that, Ranma Sao...to... HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!"
"Well," said Mars. Her brow knitted, as she tried to think of something to say. Giving up, she threw a kiss to the sky. "G'night everybody!"
© 1999 seventh@comcast.net
